This is a short video with clips of several art pieces from 2013. The song I’m singing is a partial cover, the second verse of Regina Spektor’s All the Rowboats, one of my favorites.
The year is almost over and I don’t feel bad about where I’m leaving it. I have a job I’m tolerating, my family is in decent health, I’m finally managing better my own mental health and have stuck with treatment, I continue to paint, I continue with my music and writing…Things could be worse and they have been. I’m grateful for the stability given of right now.
My first drawing of 2013.
My last drawing of 2012- crayon.
How cruel, if you lie…
To show me light –
To pour in the sky the way you do,
Lifting me high, so high…
We have to hope and I’ve promised you
Always I try
I sit tight with a brokenness inside
And wait until it’s safe to open my eyes
And believe the good won’t be
Taken from me this time…
And yet is it ever better than
What I’ve seen before?
It’s hard to trust I belong beyond
Any open door
So hard to trust I belong here…
I’m just beginning to understand that as much as I crave change, it has always been difficult for me to cope with. It may always be something I fear, but I won’t deny it is what will continue growth. No matter how difficult things become, wisdom is collected even when I can’t possibly consider it. Something to keep a bit of faith in I guess. As if we never completely let ourselves down.