A little song.

Something from last Friday. Still lonely old me at my piano. Things we do to keep our grip in life…

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Live On.

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Something I began a few weeks ago for suicide prevention week. I wanted to draw a symbol that touched on some of the difficult emotions suicide can bring up. I look at this and remember my own past with suicidal thoughts, feeling as if being removed from the lives of those around me would be better for them and a perfect answer for me. Knowing whether I’m here or not, life goes on. I can’t let go of believing life has to show up beneath the ashes eventually. With that, the weight has been easier to bear.

 

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Keep Your Eyes Peeled

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September 5, 2016 · 8:52 pm

The Falls

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Unfolding

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July 17, 2016 · 7:27 am

The Ocean

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I just felt like painting a land/seascape. I’m supposed to be on a trip to Maine in September and maybe I’ll get to see something like it up there… Life is up and down, always and always. I’m not fighting it anymore.

 

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Turned away.

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I feel a certain way where I’m unsure what will bring relief. I’m fixed into it- can’t give words to it, or distract myself from it. Part of my mind is in a panic as if drowning, but I can’t scream or reach out. Frightening. I don’t know what to do anymore. The unhappiness is intolerable and I’m losing this fight. I mean so little. That insignificance for a long time has been enough to make the decision for me. Hard to ignore.

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