Monthly Archives: July 2014

Heavenward…

Heavenward

We rise to our feet,
Unfix our eyes from the ground.
Looking up and around –
Reaching with hunger towards the sound.

Reaching with our voices, we call out
And feel the spirit sing.
And by its wondrous song,
Its joy, grace and awe,

Led heavenward,
We spread our wings.

Recorded a bit over two weeks back–when I was so much more optimistic about my chances of auditioning for the women’s choir and using this piece. I’ve been working full time at a job that calls for standing seven hours of my day, then I come home and search for coding/billing jobs (all the new positions I can apply to with my new certification to hopefully help). So I’ve been tired and drained of faith that the choir is the right thing to even look towards now. I do know I’m testing myself in how much more I can tolerate before I feel like I’m losing my grip again. Before I feel like losing my grip is the best and a sought after outcome for how terrible the day to day trying may begin to feel. Somehow everyday I’m showing up. How long it lasts is anyone’s guess.

Below is the piano version I originally paired these lines with.

I apologize for the awful vid quality. My piano doesn’t sound that bad in real time…lol

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What a true relief…

 

I can’t believe the good news…

I Passed!!!

My exam was last Saturday from 8:30-2:10pm. I put everything into my first attempt, praying I wouldn’t have to retake the test again and here I am. Certain I will not have to take the rigorous 150 question CPC exam ever again (if I turn in my CEUs on time that is…lol).

It’s funny how completely uncertain I walked away from the exam room when all was over with. I actually didn’t thoroughly finish the whole test, but I left no space unfilled on my scan-tron sheet. I only needed to answer 105 correctly for a 70% passing score. I got a 78%…

I did all of this–paying for a course I have no real background with all in the hopes of being certified in that field, all to get a better job. And Yet I’ve just finished my first day back at Goodwill full time. They rehired me in a different department (which was part of the reason I left the first time- no openings in any other departments). I got the call last Wednesday and breezed through today alright. Content to stay and save my full time wages until I do land a decent medical coding position.

Had I failed the test, it would have really crushed me in such a way I was actually scared to consider how I’d confront and ever move past. Paying no mind to the money I invested in the books and tuition, just knowing I didn’t apply myself enough to pass would have hurt the worst. The weight I placed on passing or not (meaning living or not) was extreme and unhealthy, but I’m still in recovery. We can’t have it all perfect. Though I’m grateful not to see the other side had those results not been so favorable…

Enough for now I guess. Incredibly thankful I am…

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