Yes, I did it!

I just got back from having my first voice lesson ;)

The instructor was awesome and after I got through an awkward few seconds stumbling for an explanation of why I was there (and that old “tell me about yourself” thing) I finally explained how I wanted to gain confidence with singing in front of others/develop my performance. She later commented on how clenched in my voice and stance seemed at the very start and how much stronger I’d become during the practice she led me through.

I had to say it was all nerves. I was surprised with her reassurance she wasn’t there to judge when I stopped as I thought my vocal range was nearing its limit, scared to crack or screech…lol With her instruction in breath support though, I went far above my usual range and could not believe how well she said I was doing.

The fact that I have a lower female voice allowed her to share with me some songs she’d been waiting for the right sort of voice to teach with (most of her students are of a higher range). I now have a few pieces and artists songs to research, Ella Fitzgerald particularly, and next lesson we’ll pick up from where we left off if I decide to continue.

Over all the most important thing I’ve taken away from this first lesson is how much I’ve needed to hear and see from another an excitement that is shared about something I do. Actually being present with someone else as they listen- seeing how they feel and not just blindly hoping they were moved somehow. Actually, just this very thing is surprising…how much it indeed matters others are moved. As much as were aren’t supposed to allow our emotions to run our lives, for me there is no life without them.

So anyway, I will be going back in the next week or two- depending on my funds. It’s another sort of therapy for me to work with this instructor. Just the extra help I need to get over myself and out of my head.

Below is a song I wrote again about my therapist (I know it’s probably weird for how many songs he and our discussions are the topic of, but I just find them interesting for the changes I’ve seen with this kind of relationship) It’s titled “In Need”. The recorded demo here is not well practiced, but the best of my ideas for it:

In Need

If you let me know more
I will begin to see.
I’ll be taken away;
I will begin to dream.

Desperate to distance myself from this grief,
We know I won’t get what I want,
But I will always take what I need.

And your good soul has been waiting.
Your good soul says I’m worth saving…
You lift me up, over and through,
Never mind my unwillingness to move.

Never mind I’ve been using you to choose
What to do…what to do…what to do.
Nothing of myself is true –

Never mind what to do.
We know I won’t get what I want,
But I will always take what I need.

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4 Comments

Filed under Life

4 responses to “Yes, I did it!

  1. Fantastic Allyson! You are blossoming, and your enthusiasm if contagious! I’m really excited for you.

  2. You will LOVE this Im so glad you have dived in! I am starting with a community choir at a local college. Check out your area when you get time for one, most do.

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