Find your way away.

A recent song. Something I wrote in response to my therapist after a difficult session.

Years In

Wait a moment.
Ease away from him.
Open your eyes and find
Your way away from him…

Yes – I am angry.
Full of rage and fault.
Yes – I’ve been lying.
You are trying. I am not.

I forget why it is I’m here.
Years in and my purpose
Has yet to be made clear.
I tell you all,
My dying day is near.

As driven as the rain pours down.
And once there and found,
Might my spirit be kept sealed?
Be sound…

I had a quiet but enjoyable New Years Eve. I called in last night for today’s shift after I’d noticed a break out of a rash showing up again (likely stress related) and decided to take a break. Four hours will not make or break me financially–I’m only staying at my job because it gives me a cover for what I’m doing with my time and I hope 2014 leads to a better place.

Anyway, I’ve been coping with loneliness. Falling back into difficult habits and a little uncertain now. I plan to sign up for a peer to peer program sponsored by NAMI that will begin this month near where I live. It is a ten week course covering topics of mental illness, recovery and relapse prevention. It’s free and I just hope it may ease the isolation. I need something…New people, a new way to share and be heard I think.


Filed under Life

4 responses to “Find your way away.

  1. Steven

    Regardless of what happens in relapses you can’t discount all the steps forward.

  2. Sounds like a great program. Love the new song:)

    • Yes, I’m looking forward to the info that will be shared. And thank you very much for listening to my song, Elena. Your kindness I’m always grateful for.

  3. Good luck with the program and all the best for 2014!

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