Say it’s okay.

This sketch is a few months old, reminded me of this song I wrote weeks later. As if I try to stand my ground, ignoring I’ve already lost it all.

I Once Fought

Can you do me a favor?

Can you say that it’s okay?
Maybe it’s permission I’ve needed –
Acceptance beyond my own I’ve sought –

To act upon a thought.
A dear friend I once fought.
I tried despite knowing they’d
Already won.

This video clip was done when I was working on the song arrangement still, explaining my comments at the end.

Things feel all over the place here at home. My mother, the only person around me on a daily basis, is getting frustrated with me and my depression. I try staying out of her way, keeping the door shut during really bad spells, but it’s not enough. She wants to see and be around no more of it and I understand. I wish I were gone too…I’m sorry I am this way and can’t will myself past it. Besides sticking with my medication and going to my sessions, I don’t know what else to do.

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