This song clip is the last one I’ve completed. The melody sort of popped into mind after I’d finished taking a long walk and I just wanted to get something down from it.
I haven’t been doing very well. The worst of this depression is having my only bit of certainty be held in the belief I’m going to die soon. At some moments it scares me and at others I’m just relieved it means a conclusion to what I go through and do to myself. I know I’m with an illness that I can’t just think/pray my way out of and what’s scaring me most is realizing the rest of my years won’t be without it recurring again and again. I’m exhausted.
Maybe tomorrow will be the one I’ve been waiting for.