I have been very withdrawn lately. Frustrated with people, and self-hating and bent on what to do about the storm in my head, thoughts that don’t know what to do with themselves. Anyway, I have been taking more photos, and writing a whole lot more than is normal for me. Writing about things that I usually stay away from because it was always hard for me to put very much feeling behind them. One thing that helps though is this list of questions I wrote down to ask myself everytime I want to write and get stuck on what I want to say. They are questions to help me twist the meaning and disguise the truth a bit better.
I wish I had more to say. Well, here are some new poems. One is called Spring, I started it months ago but just recently decided it was worth trying to finish (I suck at nature poems it seems…lol) The other one is something that came out of no where really. I was reading some Dorothy Parker poems and the structure of it is loosely based off her style. It has no title yet, but it’s about someone dreaming a terrible thing happened to someone they loved all because they never read into the signs the person gave them. I think about that a lot. People close to me being so blind to what’s right there, waiting and hoping they will see before it’s too late.
Spring
The sun has a new voice today
Fresh life within each brilliant ray
Soon, the grass will not be crushed
Beneath the frozen tears of
Gray winter’s monotony
It is of lush and green, we dream
Colors will soon have a scent
And textures will feels so exotic
We will all awake in spring
Nature’s kiss upon our cheek
————
Hear me, hear me
Crumbling
Ready for the fall
See me, see me
Tumbling
And do nothing at all
Bleeding, screaming
Ruining
My body’s broken through
Watching, you plead
“Forgive me”
It drains your living hue
Sullen, speaking
Riddling
I left a little clue
Fearful dreaming
Mindfully
Thinking of what I’ll do
Praying, heeding
Wondering
You cry a silent shame
Searching, seeing
Finally
Deciphering my pain
